#076: Fit the Crime

[F.U.C.K. is an e-zine that I started on January 24, 1993 and ended on January 24, 2000. One concept is that articles should be timeless if possible, so they were not released with dates. As such, the date on this blog is not exact but I will try to use a date as close as possible.]


Every day you hear more and more about violent crimes happening closer and closer to you, involving more and more people like you or that you know. Every other day you hear even more about proposed legislation that will help end all of the violence and make our streets safe again. Thing is, each and every piece of legislation is idle bullshit made to please the citizens, and make it look like some congressmen are actually doing something. Almost every time this kind of legislation is brought up it is shot back down.

Do I have an answer? Of course. Anyone with a third grade education can come up with several ideas that would end all of this shit. Will it be effective? Nope. Wouldn’t ever go through. Too many hypocrites living among us for anything to actually get through congress. First, here is my answer. After that, is why it won’t work.

First topic. Violent crime. Anything deemed violent by current laws will probably fall under this:

Murder: You take someone’s life, and are proved guilty beyond reasonable doubt, then your life goes too. None of this bullshit of someone killing one, two, three, more people, then pleading insanity and serving 10 years. You kill, you are killed.

Rape: Doesn’t matter which sex really. Guy rapes woman- He gets raped back. Throw him in a prison with documented cases of rape. Who gives a shit about him? Let him get fucked up the ass by some other convict in there. Hell, throw all the rapists in the same cell and let them see who comes out on top.

Beating: Includes mugging. Simple, you beat someone else down, especially for money or some other item of value, then you get beat back and lose some money in the process. But we can’t just have anyone do it, the person who got beat gets to do the beating. Might as well let his hate and rage go to good use.

Gang Warfare: Includes gang related murder(killing with no reason, or any bullshit reason). You shoot to kill over some lame ass color, then you get put in a special prison. There, you are forced to wear the color of the gang you are against. Crip? Then you wear red all the time. Blood? Wear blue all the time. Flash a gang sign and get the shit kicked out of you by guards. Every time you introduce a new cellmate/loser then we get to watch as they go after each other. No parole.

Other crimes. Some violent some not, and their punishment.

Drugs: Users. Sentenced to one year for using cocaine, heroin, or any other drug. During that year you will be put in a room with mass quantities of that drug. Pounds and pounds of that drug and others. Plenty of pills, needles, joints, and whatnot. Let the bastards OD and kill themselves.

Dealers. I am torn here. Here you have people using their head to take advantage of stupid people and profit heavily from it. Most American business is like that actually, except most don’t traffic in illegal substance. If the dealer uses, then the above sentence, if not, then confiscation of all weapons, drugs, and five or so years.

Child Abusers: Abuse a child, get abused back. Eye for an eye all the way with a little more thrown in for the hell of it.

Wife Abusers: Castration.

I think you get the idea. An eye for an eye is the way it should be. If you can commit a crime, then you should be ready to accept it as a victim of that crime would.

Now, why wouldn’t that work? Because so many people would cry and bitch that those are ‘cruel and unusual’ punishments. Excuse me? What do you call the crime? An eye for an eye is the most fundamentally fair system this world could achieve. It is probably 75% cheaper than the current system if not more so and is much more of a deterrent than the current system.

With today’s system of punishment, convicted killers are back on the street after 20 years and then parole. Doesn’t matter that they were sentenced 45 years, they are out in 20 with good time and other shit. Same applies to child molesters and other scum out there continually getting away with all sorts of shit, yet are back on the streets in a few short years, and sometimes sooner.

The next thing we need to get rid of is the ‘insanity plea’. Temporary insanity is the biggest loophole, and biggest shitpile this legal system has come up with. To think you can say you temporarily lost your mental faculties is so lame yet more and more criminals are getting out of jail sentences and death penalties with this shit.

After that we will get rid of is the potential to get out of a criminal charge because of loopholes in the system. If some clerk misfiles some paperwork or doesn’t file it by a certain date, who gives a shit, doesn’t mean you should be able to get out of a crime. If the arresting officer makes one mistake or forgets to say one thing, tough shit, you shouldn’t have been doing anything in the first place.

Death penalty. Why are so many people against it? Maybe it is just me, but the idea that someone can go out and kill five people, plead insanity, then get a life sentence without parole is bullshit. Why should my tax dollars go to keep him fed, in a decent living environment, for years and years? There are Vietnam vets out there that took a bullet in war for this country without food or home who deserve that criminals bed and food much more. Shit, if you ask me, more Vietnam vets and homeless should commit crime. That way they will start getting a warm meal and a roof over their head.

Bah. The system will not change much. If it does, it will most likely be for the worse. Too many whimps across the nation that won’t stand for the punishment system that we so desperately need. Just use some common sense or maybe even some logic. That’s all.

#074: Com-pyoo-ter

[F.U.C.K. is an e-zine that I started on January 24, 1993 and ended on January 24, 2000. One concept is that articles should be timeless if possible, so they were not released with dates. As such, the date on this blog is not exact but I will try to use a date as close as possible.]


A few years ago, a very small percentage of society actively used computers. Today, thousands of people purchase computers for their home or small business to do a multitude of tasks or for home enjoyment. In the past, it was TV’s, stereos, microwaves, and other inventions that changed our lives. As more and more people began to use them, more and more people learned about them. The average family has a TV, stereo, and a microwave in their house right now as well as a Personal Computer.

You take any active member of that family and ask them to program their VCR to tape a show at 1:39am on the Tuesday of next week, and five seconds later they have that done, and are asking if you want it in SP, LP, or ELP. Take them to the stereo and tell them to pick 5 CD’s, put them in, and make the stereo play them randomly, in order, reverse order, or skip certain songs, and they will have it done. Now, ask them to add a program to Windows and create an icon for it. Hours later after several calls to Microsoft, they are still having problems. Why is that?

Millions of Americans own personal computer now. Each system worth thousands of dollars. More expensive than any other item in their house usually. Even thought they spend all those dollars on this new machine/toy, they don’t take the time to learn how to use them. They would much rather jump on the bandwagon and learn the programs that they actively use. It is kind of ironic that you have a machine that is based almost 100% on logic, is being used by a person based on 1% logic.

Working in a computer store, I now get to deal with more of these people. Not only do I deal with their problems, but I have to try and guess what they did to mess things up. These people run into a problem and the first thing they do is call a computer store, the manufacturer of the software, or whatnot. No need to break open the manuals and see what is causing the problem. Let someone else do it for you.

I think that everyone who owns a computer should know the basics about it. After paying thousands of dollars for a computer, why not pay fifty bucks for a class that teaches the fundamentals of PC’s? Welp, here is a good lesson to begin with. The following applies to IBM compatible computers and their users.

DOS. An 8 bit operating system. When you boot your computer, DOS is loaded. DOS is loaded before windows, before everything else. It stands for Disk Operating System. It is a stand alone, operating system. It requires no other software to launch itself from. It uses a “command line” environment, no point and click bullshit.

Windows. A program, NOT operating system, that is a platform to launch other programs off of. Windows boots up because your AUTOEXEC.BAT and CONFIG.SYS tell it to(*). It gives you a “point and click” environment to run your applications and organize stuff. If windows has a problem, it crashed to DOS because it requires DOS to run it.

OS/2. Operating System 2. This is kind of like windows, but a little more reliable. You have icons representing applications in a point and click environment, but it is a stand alone 32 bit operating system(*). You do not need any other software to use it. Disks. Disks commonly come in two forms. A “five and a quarter” or “three and a half“. This refers to the size of them. Both are used to store programs on, and can be written to so as to copy software from one computer to another.

CDRom. This is an optical disk with information on it. Most CDRom drives can not write to a CD. These are really good for programs that require a lot of space for information. Encyclopedias, factbooks, games with a lot of graphics etc.

Knowing that, how can you explain some of the crap that goes on regarding computers today? Why do people demand software made for windows? DOS applications can run through windows believe or not. Why do people go to stores, buy software, come back the next day saying “this isn’t for windows, I need windows” acting like no one uses anything else? True, windows is popular right now, and used by millions. Millions of computer illiterate people I imagine. These are the people that buy software without reading the system requirements first. Yes…99% of software packages tell you what it needs to run on the side or the back of the box. Why are so many programs returned for these reasons: Mac/IBM, DOS/Windows, Disk/CDRom, etc. It tells you on the front of the box exactly what is in it. “IBM 3.5” or “IBM Win 3.1 Compatible CDRom” or whatever.

Anyway, so people can’t read. Forget that. Now, they get home and can’t install it. They choose to go with software that is known to have many problems, especially compatibility, and then bitch to the store that it won’t install? Computer companies shouldn’t have to hire several people full time to answer questions about their problems. Software companies already do that because they know people will have problems with their software. Don’t bother the store who sold it to you because they don’t have the author’s their to trouble shoot for you.

Why are people so insistent upon having any/all programs on CDRom? More and more people find software, read that is on disks, and don’t buy it because it isn’t on CD. Granted, games or applications that require 30+ megs should be on CD, and they are. You won’t find the KGB/CIA world factbook on disk. Too big of course. That is why they made CDrom. But more and more people are complaining that these little 1 and 2 meg programs aren’t on CDrom. Either way, they are going to have to install it to their hard drive from CD OR disk, so why does it matter?

All these people that own these computers, and that rely on windows have a problem. If I were to delete ONE line out of their “autoexec” or “config” file(*), they wouldn’t know what to do. It would take them hours to get windows up and running again. That is so lame. If you are going to rely on this program, you should be familiar with the operating system that is running it. Simple DOS commands should be natural. Knowing what each line in your config files should be the first thing you learn so that when you can’t load windows, you can go and figure out what is wrong with it and fix it. Yes, fix it yourself. It isn’t that hard.

Even though it is simple to learn, a majority of computer users don’t know about their system. They don’t use common sense when it comes to using their machine. If you have a problem, the first thing that should come to mind is reading the manual. At the store I work at, it is quite common to find someone returning an entire system because “it wouldn’t work”. As someone opens the box to make sure everything is their, the first thing that they pull out are the manuals, still shrink wrapped. 80% of the answers to your problems can usually be found in the books that comes with software or your system. All it takes is the time to read that book, and experiment. Take the time to poke around in applications you have never played with. The most that will happen is that you will delete something or mess up an application. Just reload it and try again.

I could go on and on about the yuppies that come into the store and do this and that, but I won’t. Suffice it to say that a majority of computer users these day are ignorant when it comes to using them. Quit relying on other people in computer related matters. Don’t expect an employee to know all 5000 pieces of software in a store. Don’t expect them to know all about networking when they sell mostly individual machines. Don’t expect each and every employee to know about Winfax Lite and how to set up a fax init string for it without first asking if they are a windows user. Bottom line: Use your head.

  • Don’t know what that means? You need to learn more about the machine in front of you.